Thursday, 14 July 2016

Some days may be bring sunshine and others may bring storms

Some days are going to bring sunshine... This may be receiving a letter in the mail, having a Skype call or even just a normal call. You may even wake up to a loving message from them. The time difference won't matter when you hear from them once a day. So, whatever it may be that brings you the happiness or comfort is going to make you feel like you are on cloud nine, but don't be afraid to fall.

Others may bring storms... A storm will never last forever. While they blue skies may disappear and turn into grey, it doesn't mean that a rainbow won't appear, and the blue sky won't return. So, although you may be having a bad day, remember a bad day only lasts 24 hours. Tomorrow is a new day and you can start over again, and again every morning until your loved one is reunited with you.

There are going to be days when you just want to cry. You may have one reason, many reasons or no reasons for it and at the end of the day it is okay to be like that. Many people cry.. it may not even be because you miss your loved one. Nobody expects you to be strong all the time. Just because you come across as a positive person, never be afraid to let down your walls. If you think you aren't strong, you are wrong. There is nothing to be ashamed of or embarrassed about if you aren't having a good day. I've had many so far, and he has only been away for 52 days... sounds like a long time but it's only been 7 weeks and 3 days. Somedays you'll realise that time has passed so fast and you count up how long it has been and think you are so close to them coming home. Other days it will feel like the time is taking forever and the day is longer than 24 hours.

So, if you feel like you are going to cry enough tears to fill a river, then let yourself. You may want to be alone, have someone nearby to vent to or just find a stress relief for it. Whatever your way of coping with your emotions is the best way because what works for me, may not work for everyone! It is important that you surround yourself with an amazing support group though. This may be family, friends, co-workers, someone you know that also has a loved one deployed or even someone online. You don't need to talk about them, talk about anything! I'm also finding this blog as another way to express myself as well as hopefully help other people in my position.

All of what you may be feeling is natural. While I am not an expert at this long distance - deployment relationship, I've managed to accept the bad days along with the good. At times you may deny the bad day, but eventually it will get the better of you. I can only say this one thing... you don't always need to be strong, especially around your deployed one. I was worried of making him feel guilt when expressing my emotions, but he did not mind at all. It is best for you to express your feelings so they know and can try to help you. Surprisingly, the things you may think are a big issue, they will explain to you to be something ever so simple. Two brains are better than one, and your loved one when leaving would have assumed you'd be feeling worried and anxious about them while they away. This is more than likely because you have no idea what they are doing, and generally as they can't tell you, you won't know but just believe them when they tell you they are doing well. Have trust, confidence and believe them.

Madeline - 15/07/2016

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